DC Announces Face Palm Worthy Movie Title, Collective Face Palming Alters Orbit of Earth

Ben Affleck as Batman, shot from new Batman vs Superman film

Batman looks sad, because the title of his movie is sooo bad.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice.

That title is bad and DC should feel bad.

DC has the greatest heroes of all time in their portfolio. Why do they struggle so badly when it comes to big screen?  Frankly, these movies should write themselves, but it’s always one step forward, two steps back.

Certainly DC’s multi-media efforts have undergone a sea change lately.  Setting aside Chris Nolan’s brilliant Batman films, as they standalone and don’t technically belong to the same movie continuity as Man of Steel, Man of Steel itself was a pretty decent flick (and certainly one of the super movies most successful at conveying power and collateral damage).  And of course, their television programming is humming along nicely.  That said, “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” is the worst title I’ve ever heard.  It sounds like one of DC or Marvel’s growing catalog of animated features, not a mega blockbuster going toe to toe against Captain America 3.

We get that Dawn of Justice is a reference to the Justice League, but c’mon, how much cheese ball nonsense do you truly think audiences can tolerate?   Batman vs. Superman sounds like a movie I want to watch.  Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice sounds like the most ridonkulous Law & Order spinoff EVER.  Even if Ben Affleck growls in his most gravelly voice, “You know Supes, after all versusing we did, I got to thinking, “what if we formed a league… a league committed to justice?” and the gorram sun is rising behind him, I still wouldn’t call it Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, because that is a stupid fucking title.

Even stranger was the decision to give Superman second billing in his own sequel film.  Wouldn’t it make more sense to instead make a Batman film set in the DC cinematic universe parallel to Man of Steel?  Perhaps avoid retreading the same old backstory and all that, and give us a solid Batman story with the tone they want to strike within the cohesive DC universe?  Maybe use cameos to set up the follow-on Justice League film?  Really, anything to tell a logical, cohesive story, and not the tangled mess that “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” suggests.  At least the long speculated “Batman versus Superman” set clear expectations.

Honestly, the only reason I’m complaining is because I want DC to kick as much ass as Marvel, so that my cup will forever runneth over with awesome comic book movies.  I want DC’s cinematic universe to flourish as readily as Marvel’s has, and I want it to be cogent and cohesive, not a dreadful mess like the 90’s Batman franchise, or Superman Returns (competing with Alexander for worst movie ever made with amazing source material).  So get it together, DC.  It’s not too late to call “Memorial Day Fools!” on that title.

And also, fix those cat ears on Batman in the picture above.  It’s not too late.  It’s not too late…

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This entry was posted by Chris Avery.

3 thoughts on “DC Announces Face Palm Worthy Movie Title, Collective Face Palming Alters Orbit of Earth

    • Kevin Smith says that he’s seen it, and that it is a blue and grey suit. If that is the case, I will eat my hat, because I’m ready for a blue/grey Batman. Down with the tyranny of black batman costumes!

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